未经授权不得转载
春节终于过完了，今年你又遭遇了什么？
想必，
该被催婚的都被催婚了，
该被询问工资的也被询问工资了，
好消息是，
终于可以逃离这一切回到工作岗位和学校了呢，
那么，为了缓解大家的节后创伤，英大在 上给大家搜罗了25条今年最精彩的神回复，内容遍及知乎、微博、Buzzfeed 等等等等，
还配上了独家英译哦~
01
比宇宙更大的词是什么？
Give me a word that is bigger than Universe.
“
考试范围
Exam
”
by. 沪江英语
02
你在球场上受过最严重的伤是什么？
Describe the time you got hurt the most in a game.
“
队友的女朋友过来给他送水
When I saw my teammate’s girlfriend brought water for him.
”
by. 沪江英语
03
我做错了什么？竟然上了个这么烂的大学
What have I done wrong to get in such a shitty university?
“
你做错了题
You’ve done some questions wrong.
”
by. 沪江英语
04
你家乡最美的景色是什么？
What’s the most beautiful view in your hometown?
“
我
Me
”
by. 沪江英语
05
你怎么看国庆堵车？
How do you see the traffic jam during the National Day holiday.
“
用我家的电视看呀
With my TV, of course.
”
by. 沪江英语
06
为什么大家上厕所都爱玩手机？
Why does everyone like playing with their cellphones when they’re in the bathroom?
“
玩那里的其他东西好像有点奇怪？
It would be a little weird if I play with something else which is there, right?
”
by. 沪江英语
07
史上最奇葩的广告语是什么？
What’s the most ridiculous ad in history?
“
垃圾分类，从我做起
Classify your garbage, starting with yourself.
”
by. 沪江英语
08
我是一个公务员，如何才能年入百万？
I’m a civil servant. How can I make 1 million in one year?
“
都写在刑法里了
It’s all in the Criminal Law.
”
by. 沪江英语
09
大圆脸是什么样的一种体验？
What does it feel like to have a big round face?
“
有一种被岁月磨平了棱角的感觉
It feels like time has abraised all my thorns.
”
by. 沪江英语
10
你抄过别人的作业吗？
Have you ever copied someone else’s homework?
“
我抄马克思的作业都抄了10年了
I’ve been copying Marx’s homework for a decade.
”
by. 沪江英语
11
杀气是一种怎样的感觉？
What does it feel like if someone is murderous towards you?
“
你妈叫你全名的时候
It’s like when your mother calls you by your full name.
”
by. 沪江英语
12
如何优雅地提出滚床单？
How can I propose to have sex in an euphemistic way?
“
我有一个将近3亿的项目需要你帮忙配合一下
I have a 300-million-level project which needs your help.
”
by. 沪江英语
13
如何在日常生活中活出福尔摩斯的感觉？
How can I live like Holmes?
“
你得先烫个头
First, you need to do a perm.
”
by. 沪江英语
14
练肌肉有什么用？除了形体上的好处之外？
Is there any point in building your muscle besides looking good?
“
还能和傻X讲道理呀
You can then reason with idiots.
”
by. 沪江英语
15
热恋是一种怎样的体验？
How does it feel to love somebody insanely?
“
两个长得像猪一样的人
还怕对方被抢走了。。
Two people who are on no aspect attractive worry about each other being stolen by someone else.
”
by. 沪江英语
16
如何回应「人的眼睛有 5.76 亿像素，却终究看不懂人心」？
How should I respond if someone says that a human has 576 million pixels but can’t see through someone’s heart.
“
你有100亿个脑细胞，却尽想些没营养的问题
You have 10 billion brain cells but never use them on something practical.
”
by. 沪江英语
17
女生最早发现男人都是骗子是什么时候？
When does a girl first find out that all men are liars?
“
你爸爸告诉你他愿意把全世界都给你，但是拒绝了你买雪糕的请求。
Your father promised you the whole world but refused to buy you an ice cream.
”
by. 沪江英语
18
请解释什么叫怀疑世界
Please describe how does it feel like to doubt the world.
“
试试和你的女朋友讲道理
Try reasoning with your grilfriend.
”
by. 沪江英语
19
你跑步的时候在想什么？
What do you think when you are jogging?
“
我擦，这是第几圈？
Shit! How many rounds have I finished?
”
by. 沪江英语
20
怎样把白菜卖到20块一斤？
How can I sell plane cabbage at 40RMB/kg?
“
炒一下
Stir fry it.
”
by. 沪江英语
21
呆萌和脑残的界限是？
What is the boundry between ‘clumsy’ and ‘stupid’?
“
和
the and
”
by. 沪江英语
22
女朋友来大姨妈了，男朋友应该做什么？
If my girlfriend’s period came, what should I do?
“
视若己出
See what’s hers as yours.
”
by. 沪江英语
23
为什么北方人通常比较彪悍直接？
Why do Northerners usually cut all craps?
“
天寒地冻，没时间跟你磨叽
It’s so cold. They don’t have time for your shit.
”
by. 沪江英语
24
男生说什么话
女生会觉得很大气？
What would be manly for a man to say in front of a girl?
“
买
I’ll pay.
”
by. 沪江英语
25
同龄人中不少人结婚生子了，对你有什么影响吗？
More and more of your peers got married and had kids. Does that have any impact on you?
“
对我没影响，对我妈的影响挺大
No. But it had a great impact on my mom.
”
by. 沪江英语
完
话说，
你心中最精彩的神回复有上榜吗？
如果没有的话，你的心头好是什么？
快来留言区和大家分享一下吧。
福 利 时 间
新的一年，英大为大家准备了新年礼物
——Kindle阅读器、5只超高颜值的Molly潮玩。
看电子书的必备神器，给你不一样的阅读体验。
Molly新推出的校园系列，每一款都集颜值和品质于一体。13款校园中必不可少的角色，回忆成长路上的青春轨迹。（随机送）
获取方式：在沪江英语订阅号后台回复“2019”，参与活动
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